22 Men fighting on the Field.

I'm back with an older blog again! Many apologies to those who wanted me to write something new, but in my defense, i still havn't found a good writer to rip!

I'm just trying to cash in on the current worldcup fever. I had originally written this blog in April 2004. This was the time of the first India-Pakistan series after they had stopped playing each other. So the emotions were running high in both countries. We did manage to win the series then. Ofcourse, Pakistan reversed the situation next year, when they toured India.

Anyway, without further ado, here is the blog. Your comments are awaited!


I've been told by many people that humor is my strong point. But still more people believe i should stay away from writing humor, or writing anything for that matter. They'd prefer that i was stuck in the Sahara desert with not a keyboard in sight, not even a mobile phone keyboard. That way i can't even SMS, and they can finally sleep peacefully, without worrying what horror i might wreck on them the next morning. But God so far has been kind to me, much to their consternation.

Boys usually have a very limited range of thoughts; sad, happy, angry, ecstatic, or nothing. 'Nothing' is usually our state most of the time. Theres one more state of emotion that we are put thru, and rite now 99.99% of the male population in India and Pakistan is going thru it. That is cricket emotions. Cricket provides us with all the adrenaline rush to last us till the next match, sometimes even more.

So what is cricket? 2 men in their night PJs trying to defend three upright sticks stuck in the ground from a red, round missile. And then there are 11 other men doing calisthenics that would shame a chinese gymnast. Espeically when the Mad Hatter at one end points towards the sky! Thats cricket to a layman. Presently there are no laymen in India and Pakistan. Ask any of the male species if he stands more than 1 feet tall, and he'll tell you that he's an expert and knows everything about the game. Doesn't matter if he pronounces it 'kirkeet'! He'll start with the wicket, wide ball, stumps, out, catch, LBW, and other arcane terms. He might as well be explaining Theory of Relativity, for the other person sure doesn't understand anything. Don't worry, neither does he!

We are affected, and how! I myself have danced an impromptu jig alone in my room whenever a wicket fell (the people downstairs weren't very amused though). The best way to watch a match, besides in the stadium is the college hostel common room. I was never a hostelite, but used to go over to the hostel during a match. There u can see all the boys display the complete range of emotions that they possess (except maybe the special one reserved for girls, and i'm not talking about love!). And if anyone whispers about changing the channel, even during an ad about a new style of head-dress for sahara desert, and he's a marked man! he will be shunned for the rest of his life, if he's lucky. If he's unlucky, there won't be much of his life left anyway.

The roar that greets every ball bowled by any indian bowler is great. The roar when a opposing team's wicket falls down is even greater, and thats saying a lot. We have stuck our fingers in our ears as far as they can go in, and howled on top of our lungs any time a wicket fell.

Nowadays our conversation is limited to gullies, silly point, mid on, mid off, leg breaks, byes, wides, etc... etc... etc... Nothing else is on our mind, not even Mallika Sherawat. But who can blame us. Cricket gives as much twists and plots and sub-plots as any of the Bollywood potboilers. It has action, drama, high emotions, romance (usually off the field!), tragedy, comedy (Inzamam running towards the crease with the bat in the wrong hand and getting run-out!).

Wifes and girlfriends say we don't pay attention to them when a match is going on. But we do. Now i'm sure i noticed my girlfriends new... Hey thats a catch. Great catch Dravid. Kya wicket liya.... I'm sorry like i was saying, i do notice a lot of things besides the match... Oh no, a no-ball! C'mon Agarkar, they don't need the extra runs!!!.... sorry again; what was i saying??? Oh what the heck, i won't pretend any more. I don't notice anything, not even that the my lunch is burnt to a cinder and i might be starving for the next 6 hours! Advice to all the ladies, if you want us to pay attention to you, wear a T-shirt that shows Tendulkar hitting a Six, or Pathan rejoicing after a wicket. No don't come naked, that won't catch our attention! And please try it between the overs.

To many people Life is a Game, to us Cricket is Life! Period.